I thought this morning was awkward, well the day was just beginning. I crashed out on the bed, the cold getting the better of me. I heard him leaving to go and fix her clutch. What a joke he couldn't fix a plug in under a year and as for cars he is clueless. But off he trotted to do his new ladies bidding. I collected the kids from school, and tried on some new clothes (Depression shopping). I'm standing in my undies after taking off a new dress and I hear the close door going. Panicked look outside and her cars there, so he's back. I slam the door over and throw clothes on.
Just in time because the first thing he does is open the door to say he's back, the kids are knotting themselves laughing at my panic and the close call. Not helped by the fact that he's brought Girl 2 in as well! Now I get to show off my grown up skills by being civil and chatty, yeah I'm not really cut out for this. I think I made a good showing.
They have to go to collect Girl 1's clothes, I say nothing but I'm really wondering what the heck has happened. Is she my new house mate and no ones told me? They come back after a while and I'm still chatty and normal. I get the kids off to bed and he peels potatoes for 'their' dinner. I wasn't hungry anyway, but thanks for not offering. They decide to hold dinner until they know what time Girl 1 is back, okay then. He gets a call from Birthday girl asking if he can walk her dog while she's at work and they leave, he did ask Girl 2 if she wanted to stay, I guess she felt a little awkward at that idea! They're away about 10 minutes and the buzzer goes, now they are still driving each others cars so I know he doesn't have the house keys, she does. I answer the buzzer and its her. I don't know where to put myself, though I am tempted to just lock the front door. This being a grown up is harder than it looks.
I stick my head out and say where they are, half to give her a chance to wait outside, but as I would of guessed she's a brazen hussy who has done no wrong. So in she trots and sits in the sitting room, I vanish to the bedroom and try to ignore her presence. Her phone dings persistently, I'm assuming messaging him telling him how she's loving this atmosphere. He eventually calls her and I can tell from her side that my behaviour is being checked up on. 'Yes she let me in', 'no, it's fine'.
Needless to say they are back very quickly. The peeled potatoes lie forgotten in the kitchen in favour of alcohol and a board game that Girl 1 has brought. CSI. Sounds thrilling, although the conversation of cheating and lying has me silently choking down bitter laughter. He kindly offers me the chance to play with them.
In the interests of honesty I explain that considering the previous sentences, I might find myself making sarcastic comments. Girl 1 chortles from the other room but he looks a little put out that I'm not willing to play house. To placate him, and loudly enough to encourage an opinion from the others, I insist I'm happy to play. But they have to expect the occasional bitchy comment. I get nothing more than a 'never mind' as he walks away. If his lady is so kind she'll put up with it, and she is also bitchy and sarcastic so wheres the issue. I reckon its him being a coward.
So now I sit typing this while they listen to music and play CSI in my living room. Fun fact; when I first met him I religiously watched many TV shows which he dismissed as rubbish, between our busy house and the television turning into a console monitor I stopped watching them all. And CSI was one of those shows, which he has now watched all of and become a massive fan of. It's a funny world isn't it
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