The very day we arrive back from the holiday is the day she decides to surprise and treat me. She is apparently making me dinner, despite never cooking a roast before that's what she sets out to wow me with. For the love of God order a Chinese or buy me chocolate! Do not destroy my whole kitchen and give me 4 hours work of cleaning. That is not a bloody surprise!
Needless to say he decided to help her with the shopping and starting off the cooking. Where did this domestic God surface from? He's only present at Christmas and times when he needs to impress someone. The food is all full price and the kids won't eat half the veg, but I keep mum. After all I'm to help dish it out so I can work around it.
For some unknown reason he decides its not weird enough and ends up inviting Girl 2 down. She can't eat due to physio, so only hovers and talks constantly about herself. What have I done to deserve this fresh hell. Being nice to two people at the same time. Thanks.
An edited dinner put down to the kids, I choke down most of mine, it was fine, I just found it hard to sit around being normal. Not helped in the slightest by Girl 2 quizzing us (yup really quizzing us!) on his preferences and how we deal with various aspects of our relationship. Yeah now tell me why that wouldn't be awkward. His ex and his current missus trying to play normal and she is digging like she urgently needs to know everything about him. I'm positive even the new girlfriend thought it too far, although I may have misjudged the alarmed looks and eye rolling.
Seriously who does something that stupid, doesn't she know I struggling to keep control of my nasty temper? Did she miss the memo, or not care, or just really want to stir things up?
He calls and asks for a chicken sandwich, we don't have half the stuff he wanted in it. I guess that's what happens when he does his own shopping. Back in the kitchen, little miss 'I can't eat', helps herself to the chicken skin and most of the chicken and suggest a packed lunch for his dinner. The new girlfriend looks at me for help and I just go with it.
A while later, a cheese string, lollipop, fruit shoot and sandwich are nestled in a Frozen packed lunch box, and they disappear for the rest of the night leaving me with the dishes and a budding headache from all the happy lying smiles. It turns out that the whole idea was mine, not quite. But sure if I'm needed I'm there for them.
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